ADVICE FOR NEW BRIDES 

Years ago (more like eons) a Kentucky grandmother gave her Granddaughter bride the following instructions  for washing clothes.

 1. Bilt fire in backyard to heat kettle of rain water.
(sounds like a plan, now where the heck did I put that rain water?)

 2. Set tubs so smoke wont blow in eyes if wind is pert.
(Good idea-put wet finger in air to test wind direction)

 3. Shave one hole cake of lie soap in bilin water. 
(Wait a darn minute, there's no TIDE?)

 4. Sort things, make 3 piles. 1 pile white, 1 pile colored, 1 pile work britches and rags. 
(Now we're talking, sounds reasonable)

 5. To make starch, stir flour in cool water till smooth, then thin down with bilin water.
(Ah Heck, just give me the spray can)

 6. Take white things, rub dirty spots on board, scrub hard, and then bile.  Rub colored, don't bile, just rinch and starch. 
(Now who took my Clorox Spot Remover?)

 7. Take things out of the hot  kettle with broomstick handle, then rinch, and starch. 
(Ouch)

 8. Hang work cloths and old rags on fence.
  (Great, where's the fence?)

 9. Spread tea towels on grass. 
(Oh sure, what about all the critters running around)

10. Pore rinch water in flower bed. 
(Good Idea, waste not want not, right???)

11. Scrub porch with hot soapy water. 
(Uh Oh, I'm fresh out of a Porch)

12. Turn tubs upside down. 
(Upside down?  I would place them under the rain gutters.  Seems like this would be a good way to catch that precious rain water)

13. Go put on clean dress, smooth hair with hair combs. Brew cup of tea, sit and rock a spell and count your blessings. 
(After a day like I've just had, it better be pretty darn close to 'tuni time'.

I think I'll frame this and hang it in the laundry room - We've come a long girls !!!

 

 

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~~~Sunset by Torie~~~